Thursday, November 2, 2017

Day 36 - 49: Molding Mindset




Day 36 - 49: Molding Mindset

Dreamfood:

  • I traveled to the coast of Guatemala, to Monterrico, and witnessed it's beautiful black sand beaches with 6 other students (Gwen, Yasmin, Morgan, Andrew, Clare, and Jen) for our first IST or independant student travel.
  • I watched as a mother sea turtle layed her eggs in the sand and lovingly sent her off to the great big blue accompanied by 2 Australians and a local (I'll expand in a sec).
  • We took a "tour" of the mangrove forest led by the father of the single employee of our hotel. He wasn't an official tour guide, he was just a man with a boat. That made it even better.
  • I ate the best Italian food I've ever had...in Guatemala. The b&b we stayed at was family owned by an Italian man, Felipe, who gave up his life in Italy for a life of travel after working 18 hour days for 20+ years. He finally settled down here in Guatemala where he met his wife. Now, they own, live at, and operate La Palma b&b in Monterrico along with their 3 year old daughter, Mary Angela. I can safely say that is one of the best hotel experiences I have ever had. One of the first things Felipe said (in english even though he is fluent in 6 languages), is that we are guests, not clients. Since they lived in the hotel as well, it really felt like they had welcomed us into their home. For many meals we decided to pay the extra 100Q (roughly $15) for lunch and dinner because his cooking was so amazing. $15/100Q is a lot to pay for a meal here, but we all concluded it was so worth it. Plus, it's cheap in American standards. For dinner one night he cooked a three course pizza dinner - easily the best food I've had this whole trip and possibly the best pizza I've had in my entire life. Also, it was my friend, Yasmin's, birthday during our trip and they just made her a cake! I think this is just turning into an ad for La Palma and Monterrico... oh well.            
Homestay Heart:
  • So, Ana Maria asked me what my father is like, and I tell her he likes to fish. She asks if he sells his fish at a market. I explained that he mostly caught the fish and threw them back. A concerned and confused look spread across her face... then she said that was a sin. We both laughed after that.
  • I also told Ana Maria that my family didn't usually eat meals together and that my mom didn't cook meals for us that often (sorry mom not trying to @ you). She followed with questions about my mom's health and well-being because "a woman cooks for her family".
  • Ana Maria talks A LOT about novios or boyfriends. My roomate, Caroline, is currently in a relationship with another student on the program and Ana Maria brings it up at every meal. Also, any time I bring up a male she asks if he is my new boyfriend. It was cute and fun at first, but now I feel a culture value clash upon me. Even though she is a single woman, it seems that she very much values men. When she asks me if I want to get married, or have kids, or some other person is my boyfriend, I often reply that my future is open to all possiblities, and that I am currently exploring myself as an independant woman. She agrees with me, but it gets interesting sometimes. One time, she made her 13 year old godson walk me somewhere at 9am because Caroline wasn't there to walk with me. It makes me want to express my values of everyone as equals, but the struggle is that I am not here to spread my values, I am here to learn from others values, lives, and cultures in order to develop my individuality and cross-cultural perspective.
  • Last Saturday, Ana Maria was taking us to a party and we had to be home by 4:30 to leave. I was in a cafe at 4 when it started to down pour. Now, I've been sick with a cold for the past 2 weeks, and I did not think walking 15 minutes home would be the best idea. But, I didn't have a phone to contact Ana Maria, so I decided to walk home anyway. After all, I had my rain jacket. First, let me tell you something I've discovered about the draining systems in Guatemala. They work by filling the streets with an ankle-high river of water that flows into drains located at the bottom of the natural hills the streets are paved(?) over. Also, there are many stray dogs. These dogs are unhealthy. They poop all over the streets, and it's very unhealthy looking. No one picks it up. They wait for it to rain. So, when you're walking through the streets when it's raining; you're treading through a shit river. Which is exactly what I did, all the way home. And upon my arrival I learned that we could no longer go to the party because of the rain.
  • Following that, Ana Maria invited me to joinher in talking with the nuns that live in our wall(?). I thought why not and went, soaking wet to talk with some nuns. I actually had a great night with the nuns. They laughed at me multiple times. One, because I leaned against the wall in my soaked legging and when I removed myself there was a booty print on the wall. They didn't let that one go. 
  • Speaking of that night an those nuns, they poisoned me. They offered me some peanuts, an I accepted unknowingly. The next day I was so weak I couldn't even walk down stairs, and was in and out of the bathroom on multiple occasions. This is probably one of the first times the homesickness really hit. I was laying in my bed (that is a cot just btw) and just wishing my fam was there to take care of me. I'm including this detail just to show the harder part of this amazing trip. Yes, it's amazing and I'm learning so much, but it's not easy whatsoever. We recently had a discussion about comfort zones. TBB optimally wants you operating in what they call the learning zone, for as much of the day as possible. The learning zone is right outside your comfort zone. I'm certainly not in my comfort zone; I have to communicate largely in a different language, cultural context, and eat different food (though I really have come to love corn torillas and red beans.) But, all this not being comfortable for most of a day takes a toll on a person. I recharge myself by reading and interacting within our TBB group. 
Culturescape:
  • We went out dancing/clubbing during our Saturday in Monterrico. As it got later, more and more gay couples dominated the dance floors. Everyone was just having a great time, and I didn't see any hostility or disgust targeted the gay couples. I was very surprised to see this in Guatemala...
  • Also, I NEVER felt harassed. Unfortunately as a woman, I expect harassment especially in places where I am a foreigner since my skin color makes me stand out. But, all the men would just make intense eye contact, read how you respond, and then decide whether to approach or not. I've never been to a club, or out dancing with strangers like this in the US so unfortunately I can not compare experiences. But, I can tell you that I expereinced very respectful men in Monterrico, Guatemala.  
STORY TIME:

1) To begin with the light-hearted story, all of the students in Monterrico went out dancing for Yasmin's birthday. It was super fun even though one of our PLs, Patrick, decided to join us. Somehow four of us survived long enough to be out dancing until 2am, when we called it quits. We walk back all excited since it's been about 2 official hours of Yasmin's birthday. As we arrive at the gate of our hotel, the excitement quickly transitions to frustration as we realize that none of us have our keys...or phones. So we're stuck outside of a hotel gate at 2 am in a new town, a vacation town at that, on a Saturday night in a foreign country. Also, none of us were real Spanish speakers... So, we were a bit screwed. Many ideas came and passed. We felt terribly ringing the bell given our lovely relationship with the owners, but we had to try. It would have less reprecussions than sleeping on the street, which was barely considered but considered none the less. Our best idea was to walk to the open store down the street and ask for the hotel's phone number and to use a phone; that failed. We yelled at a window of a room of a fellow student; that failed. The thought about me climbing the fence onto the roof and jumping down; that was abandoned because I didn't want the cops called. After, banging on the gate for a good 10 minutes, it was now 3am, and we decide to go ahead with another plan. The gate to the hotel was door-sized with the typical Guatemalan spikes across the top. I'm talking sharp spikes. But, Gwen was confident in her ability to not die and climb over the spikes with our assitance in hoisting her up. We lifted Gwen cheerleader style; one foot held by Jen and one by Yasmin while I lifted from behind. The operation was running smoothly until suddenly Gwen started scrambling to get down. Me, confused, continued to lift because my first instinct was that she was falling. She managed to avoid our lifts and touchdown on the ground where she ran at me, cry-laughing, and saying "He's here!". A moment later the gate swung open to reveal the one the only, Felipe. He was obviously tired and confused. All we could do was rush in the gate spitting out many "lo ciento"s, and feeling embarrassed and terrible, yet not being able to contain our laughter at the whole situation. We all went straight to bed, attempting not to wake the others with our giggles. Now, the next morning, most of us were dead asleep and didn't make it to breakfast on time. Jen and I wanted that man's delicious breakfast, so we made a point to wake up. We walked into the kitchen that morning and Felipe looked at us and said, "Spider woman."

2) This story I'm about to tell you is one of my favorite moments on this entire trip so far. So, we went out to dinner for Yasmin's birthday and were walking home along the beach. On our walk we noticed there were many people with very bright flashlights scattered equal distance from each other along the beach. Patrick believed they were looking for sea turtles and that we could on the off-chance come across one ourselves. Of course about five minutes later, we start to approach a dark figure in the distance. As we come closer we see that the figure is in fact a random white man sitting in the sand, alone. Now, I think that this is weird so I give him a weird half smile and continue past him. A couple of seconds later, from the group behind me, I hear some surprised noise and Gwen says "Oh. That's a turtle," in an laughing tone. I assume she mistook the man for a turtle and was talking to the man, so I don't turn around. But, Yasmin, whom I'm walking beside, turns and says "There's a turtle!" and makes her way towards the man and the other group. I follow because why not, and I am stopped by in fact a turtle in the middle of the sand, laying her eggs. Now, the man has changes positions. He was then standing and talking closely and quietly with Jen, and meanwhile another man, one with a bright flashlight had approached. I assumed the white man was telling Jen all about his work with turtles, and I assumed the other man was a co-worker. I didn't really care much about their conversation at the time since there was a live sea turtle in front of me. Yasmin apparently did though and she made her way to where Jen and he man were talking, and she then returned to report. Yasmin regurgitated that the man, who was an Australian tourist, came across this turtle with his girlfriend on their way home from dinner, and he was now protecting it from the locals who he believed ate the eggs. The other man was actually a local man who was apparently poaching these eggs. The situation changed right then and there and everyone changed to sea turtle saving mode. But, I was skeptical. TBB has taught me that listening, especially to locals is very important and so is watching how quickly you assume. Most of our group immediately assumed that this Australian tourist was correct in his assumptions. At this time, the girlfriend returned from their hotel where she went to find someone to help, and the man left to attempt to do the same elsewhere. The local man said something to her in Spanish that I didn't catch, and she responded "They're coming." To this Patrick said "No, he was asking if your boyfriend was going to get a bag." Which is where I realized that these Australians could not speak Spanish. Therefore, how could they know what this local man planned to do with the eggs. Before, I had assumed they were right that the locals ate the eggs, but I wasn't sure if interfering was the right thing to do. Now, I saw that they had no idea what they were doing. Patrick began to speak to the local, and I couldn't make out what was being said. Around the same time they began speaking, the turtle had apparently finished laying her eggs, and the local man lifted her out of the hole, placed her down almost next to it, and began to harvest the eggs. This stirred up feelings within our group, Yasmin began crying, and I realized some people still firmly believed everything this man did was with malintent. After a minute or two of conversing with the man, Patrick translated that he did not plan on eating the eggs. He sold them to a local hatchery. I asked the man some questions along with Patrick and we discovered that this was the man's primary source of income, seven dozen eggs (about what the turtle layed) would go for 100Q (quetzales) or about $15, and he would usually find 2 turtles a night. That means at best this man makes $30 a day or $210 a week to, I assume based on the culture and his age, feed a family. Meanwhile the turtle had buried her eggs... well she thought she was. She was actually just tossing sand everywhere and all over herself, which the man kindly swept off her back. Now, she was making her way back to the ocean and everyone followed. I walked with the local man and continued to ask questions. Right before the turtle found her way into the ocean, I asked if he liked turtles. He said "Of course, they are beautiful" (this is translated from Spanish of course). When the wave finally hit the turtle he raised his hand to wave and said "Adios!" It was almost as amazing to hear as it was to see the turtle return to the ocean. Patrick , the local, and I said a couple more 'adios's and the man began to leave. He had already collected all the eggs for the Australians who he let have them because they were there first, and the Australians planned to take them to the hatchery the next day. As he walked away I yelled, "thank you! It was very nice to meet you!", but I couldn't shake the feeling that we just participated in doing this man a disservice. It was so interesting to watch the Australians' good intent have a bad outcome. Some of the others still walked away from that feeling good, like they'd saved the sea turtles, when in actuality, I felt we robbed a hard-working man half of his daily income. I learned so much from that amazing experience. I learned that TBB had changed the way I view the world. I got to witness assumptions being made left and right, and how far those assumptions were from the truth. I also got to see good intentions have a bad outcome all within this small controlled situation. It made me think of foreign AID programs where the good intent to 'save' people ends up doing just the opposite. 

Now, I have a challenge for you. I want you to pick one day, one afternoon, one hour of your life and write down every assumption you can catch. Now, this might take some practice, since spotting your own assumptions is tricky. But, why not try it out? You'd be surprised how many you make every minute. I can even give you an example: 
Observation - there are two people playing video games behind me, they yell occasionally
Assumption - From the tone of their voices I've concluded that they are male, and based on the fact they are playing video games I assume they're teenagers.
It can be exhausting to actually write all of these down, but this is a DIY challenge. You can do whatever you want with it, and if you wanna share the results on social media, go for it. But, you can also share them with me! Email me at megfordyce392@gmail.com !

I'm writing this Day 52, but need to finish so I won't include the events of the last couple days. I hope everyone is enjoying these blog posts and possibly learning from them. Also, I'm open to feedback for future posts like if there's something I'm not including that you want to know about such as more daily functions. I also want to start a new section of my blog; a 'Books Read' section, so you can read along with me! 

Books Read:

  • Ishmael by Daniel Quinn
    • This was the first book we were required to read on the pre-reading list. I can't say anything about this book without ruining it, but it is easily my new favorite book.
  • The New Confessions of an Economic Hitman by John Perkins
    • This was the second. The title had economics in it, therefore making me not want to read it. But, this book is REALLY interesting. It makes you reevaluate everything you thought about the reasons behind the US involvement in other countries and it's obvious imperialism.
  • Savages by Joe Kane
    • I began reading this book for fun. I found it scrolling through my TBB assigned kindle. There's more about US imperialism as it follows oil companies in the Amazon during the 80s and 90s. It more closely follows those effects on the Huaorani, an indigenous people from the Amazon. I couldn't put it down as I learned more about Huaorani culture, and the events that unfolded in this thrilling narrative. 
  • Whatever It Takes by Paul Tough
    • I haven't finished this one. In fact, I just started it for a pre-read to the education unit in Thailand. Already love it. It follows a program created to help kids in poverty rise out through education in New York during the 90s. I also can not put this one down. 

Human Highlight:
The local Monterrico man. I apologize for aiding in stealing $15 from you.
Fun Fact:
We went on a mangrove tour in Monterrico and when we asked the 8 year old kid, Aiden(?), if there's any pollution he responded, "Yes, there are many cars, boats, and DOGS."

Be inquisitive.
It's my new favorite thing.

"So what? Now what." - Linda Cliatt-Wayman
A quote about excuses in a podcast I listened to with the group: TED Radio Hour: Rethinking School

Click here to see a video about my time in Guatemala!

Keep thinking,
Meg

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